Monday 10 September 2012

150 SHADES OF TORTURE!



I flipped through the first book and all i have to say is Jehovah take the wheels! Somebory is not married and somebody isn't getting *cough* some so it’s pure torture. Thanks to Luscious Lue, I entered a giveaway by Nwunye of How to Love Igbo Things and i won! Yay me!

The rules: I’d like 100 words on THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING that has ever happened between you and a guy/girl you really really like. Heck, make it up if you have to.
Go crazy.

My entry: I hooked up with this hawt guy I liked in university. We hadn’t seen for a while so when he suggested lunch I agreed.  After the delightful meal, he offered to drop me home. As I got out of the restaurant, I slipped and my very pencil skirt, which had a front slit, tore all the way to my pubic area. Did I mention I was going commando because I hate pant lines? I wanted to die. His reaction? The monkey pointed at it (the idiot, as if i needed direction) and started laughing. During the trip home, he couldn’t keep the smile off his face. He apologized but let’s just say that was the end of that. A-hole

Hey! Don’t look at me like that! It’s cool to feel some breeze under there sometimes you know. *cough* Anyway, don’t ask if that’s real or fiction. You hear? You hear?
Ok good.

I finally got my books (I’m considering them my birthday present) thanks to Nwunye.

So after my books arrived, guess who showed to visit me? Yea, Mo aka my bestie. The very same babe who i have been begging to come visit. She decided to miraculously show. And no, she didn't miss me. She came for the 150 shades of torture. *Shaking my head slowly for her* Even if i and the rest of the world are not getting any *cough* it shouldn't stop my friend from getting her groove on ba? #NowMentallyOrganisingaBaby/BridalShower because she is getting preggers for sure.

So i used the picture of the books as my Blackberry Display Picture and a friend buzzes me:
Im: Very bad book, please don't read, I won't buy the others...
Toin: Lmao. That bad huh? I have the 'tiri' (three) o! *covers face*
Im: Hehehehe better read up then...
Toin: Ah, read up ke? I'm not ready yet. Thank God books don't expire.
Im: It'll be out of your head in a week.
Toin: Alright then. I will think abourit

7days later

Im: Did you start the books? Nobody to discuss with.
Toin: Not yet. Why? Just flipped through the 1st one. I've borrowed a friend actually.
Im: I'm on the second book, couldn't help it. Apart from the kinky stuff, it's a very moving love story. Read it jor.
Toin: Lmao. Thought you weren't reading anymore :D
Im: I couldn't help it
Toin: So it's good then?
Im: Very very. Please dig in. I can't stop, my husband seized it, I almost went crazy.
Toin: Lmao smh4u

So fingers crossed

I know i've been MIA lately but i'll be back with juicy gist soon. #wink.

Shout out to the newest engaged couple: 9jas great and Becqui. May God bless your new journey xo

Kisses

46 comments:

  1. lol @ 150 shades of torture......very appropriate name. i'm reading the third book and so far its cool (not in your regular cool way o)

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  2. Thanks for hopping by my blog!! I appreciate you!

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  3. 150 shades of toture?? LOL i am an ardent reader but critics say the book is not that good so im n ot sure i want to spend my time reading it... maybe on a very jobless weekend i can try... lol P>s I love your new blog look, love the blog and i think you are awesome... cn you hook me up with the blog design?? take care.

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  4. Congrats... For me it's 'the hunger games' after seeing reviews, I told myself I'm not going to read it, but I reconsidered after I saw it has over 1million reviews, wow. As for 50 sh.... I'll pass.

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  5. ahahahahahahaha, so i should not ask?...i go ASK oo! Toin, nah fiction abi e happen for real! ..ahahahaha. Yeah! it was a good one..congratulations.....so the book is so interesting ehn? That is why they say, don't judge a book by its cover...150 shades of grey.. never read it, but will someday.
    Take care and thanks a lot for always a visiting my blog.

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  6. loool, i love the title "150 shades of torture"...interesting triology!

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  7. WOW!! I giggled my way through the entire post! As for 150 shades of torture (I said the same thing when I read it but for different reasons), please don't read it if you're a book nerd... You wold want to stab yourself in the eye with a fork

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  8. 50 shades oooo lol!! The wahala that these books have caused ehn. It is well! Come back with the juicy gist o. Tenks 😉

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  9. Lol; I hope that your story didn't actually happen... embarrassment wouldn't describe the feeling.

    150 shades of whatever...I'm even more confused about the books now than I was when I first heard about them. Too many conflicting reports.

    @la~pimpette: Lmao at "stab yourself in the eye with a fork". What?!?

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  10. The story of the torn skirt, I am hoping did not happen for real oh...because that is so embarrassing.

    I think I need to get my hands on the 50shades book, too many noise about the book already.

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  11. It's very unfortunate that i cannot write the book with you,it'd have been a good book.Thanks for the wishes!

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  13. Read it....all 3 in one weekend. The kink was not kinky enough for me, read kinkier *shrugs* In a former life...3 or 4 years ago...I collected erotica so 'I haff spoil finish'But I loved their story. I skipped over the kink to hear their gist.

    Commando eh * frantically wiggling eyebrows up and down in a lascivious manner* You are somehow and I just KNOW this story is true. Omokomo geh! Lol.

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  14. lol @ the skirt split story. Please o even I have been undecided abut 50 shades. Read and tell me whether I should continue past the 5th page

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  15. Toiiiinnnnnnn, I come to your blog to laugh, and laugh I do.... ok o, the story fiction or not, I hope you gathered your skirt and swaggered into the car.. heehehehehe..

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  16. Afi 150 shades of torture naa...i tried reading the first book I didn't get pass the 2 or 3 chapters. I don't think I want to continue the book sef, at least not now

    I remember reading the story on Nwunye's blog...could not stop laughing, I'm glad you won

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  17. lol...you call am 150 shades of torture..drop the book naah! You think say Jehovah go save you from carrying the book? You're on your own oh!

    Take am easy sha...you know how it is how bad things can taste sweet but give you stomach ache.

    That dude that pointed at your skirt must be a super douche

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  18. Congrats on your books! But please, the story of your torn skirt is almost real...so real I'm almost paranoid about wearing skirts now. I now have standards for skirt shopping: choose skirts that allow for flying kicks and splits! No more embarrassments! Lol :)

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  19. So did the accidental slit happen for real? LOL...

    As for 50 shades, your friends sure will enjoy...

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  20. U re lazy joor,I have to wait one month to hear from you,not fair.
    And am looking forward to reading that someday.hehehehe

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  21. Please say the skirt story is fiction.
    Pleeeeaaaasssseeee!!!

    I'm laughing and hoping you'll say it is...

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  22. Shet! i can imagine how embarrassed you must have been about your skirt.

    Really looking forward to the juicy gist *wink*

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  23. Please, tell me the skirt stuff didn't really happen... for your sake. Kai.

    As for 50 shades, that is one book I definitely won't be reading. My heart is so precious, and I need to guard it with all diligence.

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  24. Me tamie will still ask o,did the skirt story really happen??

    When will u borrow me one of the 50's so I'll decide whether I'll read or not?

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  25. lol Toin..you are just a case i have to ask is that story true??? i will probably kill myself afterwards..lol!....meanwhile i won't be reading t0 shades of grey either like Atilola, i need to guard my heart and the reviews i have read about it ..ill pass

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  26. Lol @ the skirt story...hmm, I have a feeling it is real.. Tell us if it is joor.

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  27. LOL at the accident story. Wow! Wouldn't want to be that girl ;)
    Congrats on your new book

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  28. Congrats on the new book. I really will like to know if that story is real oh. Now, everybody wants to know that too - so, it is not only me. Tell us o...

    www.josephomotayo.blogspot.com

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  29. heehehehehehehehehehehhehehehe@ur story
    u ds babe!!!!!u no dey ooo
    as fr 50 shades of black abi grey de ni...*coughhhhhhhhhhhh....**serious coughinggggggggggg......adjusts glasses and fingers the book away from ur hand..biko...u wont die if u dnt read d book, ko?...loool
    read the reviews and im so not getting a dose of 'mummy porn.' LOOOOL

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  30. LMAOOOO!!!!!>..where you get stuffs like that from ummmhh...
    as fr the 50shades stuff...nahhh..i'll pass..not my kinda book anyways...hope ure good and tanx fr ff me and commenting..xoxo..really appreciate it

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  31. **meant where do you get stuffs/stories like that from

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  32. That your story ehn! A good example of how real life is so much better than fiction. Congrats on winning the giveaway though. As for the book, I have heard enough about it to know I won't read it.

    Earnestly awaiting more gist!

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  34. Blessings.....
    Reading is like eating, some things are simply an acquired taste, cause what taste good for one may not taste good for another and another might be allergic, got my drift? I tend not to necessarily let what critics say dictate what I read, see or wear, but that’s just me.

    50 shades of gray is not for the faint of heart, it is very explicit and not everyone can read such books. I haven't read it yet and am not sure I will get to it this year but perhaps a year from now if i feel like it, don't know depends on my mood. I have a 100 book goal this year to accomplish and these 3 are not on my list, so far i have read 76 and currently reading 77 & 78. Though part of my challenge is also to read outside my normal genre which 50 Shades fit the bill but i won't be buying it, probably borrow from the library or perhaps someone would gift it to me, then I'd read. Perhaps i sound cheap but truly I would read books outside my genre due to my personal challenge, i am simply not going to buy them. I am making full use of my library, they already know my by first name haha.

    This year I’ve read books i never thought i would, some were good, some were ah....for lack of a better word shocking, some were blah, some i had to force myself to get through all for the sake of keeping my word to myself which is what the challenge really is about - honoring myself and my word.

    Congrats on winning.
    have a blessed day.
    Rhapsody

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  35. lool.. come on just between us... is the story real or fake....
    i loved sooo hard, my jollof rice was coming out the wrong places... smh...
    Commando you know loooool..
    tell me please.. tweet me.. inbox me...

    50shades of torture... I want to read it but i am scared.. me too i am not getting some lol..
    virgin in the physical but mentally... challleee loool..

    God bring my husband that is all i will say hmmmm

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  36. Ummmm... All I have to say is... READ THE BOOK!

    *COUGH*

    :-)

    ~Sherine
    Confessions Of A City Girl

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  37. haha... yeah i heard that was a good book, from what i hear its almost like Venus in Furs but a bit more raunchy. how have you been missy.

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  38. Ahhhh aunty T you a spoilt ohh will report u to Mumay...lool..

    that story got me laughing... o no bad embarrassment... i believe its real sha, pele but jokes still xx

    as for that book am with @tiola with that one guarding my heart with all I can.

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  39. Buhahahaha, you r just so hilarious...thanks for stopping by at my blog! oh by the way (is the story true or fake...#Just Asking)...thumbs up
    www.kemifilani.blogspot.com

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  40. oh, sowi, I forgot to add that my GFC is now available *wink*

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  41. Lue: On the 3rd book already and you say it's cool but not in a regular way? Alright, i'll think abourit ;)

    Cindy: You're welcome

    MissLara: Aww, thanks for your lovely comments. I love your blog too and i always come around even though i don't comment often *covers face*

    I got my new look from http://www.bestbloggertemplates.net You'll find so many amazing templates from there and how to update yours.

    31st Chain: A million reviews??? Wow! I still have Hunger Games on my radar too so how's it going? Good read?

    Siimply me: Thank you ma'am and please don't ask o *covers face* Your blog is too real to pass up o jere. Love it.

    Nikkisho: Girl, all kinds of torture o. I'm not even sure i can deal. I'm loving your new hair though. Wish i could do the same.

    La Pimpette: Lol. I'm sorta kinda maybe a book nerd and i certainly don't want to stab myself in the eye with a fork (ewwwww) so to read or not to read...

    Mstizzle: In fact, me sef tire but we shall see. The gist is coming soon*wink*

    Morounfoluwa Lukina: Very very soon *wink* I wonder why i don't get your updates on my blogroll though.

    Feyi: What story *feigning ignorance* Lets read the book and compare notes. What say you? As for La Pimpette's comment, quite graphic right? lol


    Lara: I wanted to know what all the noise was all about but right now, i'm not so sure :D As for that story en, ask me no questions and i'll tell you no lies *wink*

    9ja's Great: You're welcome man.

    Cherry my durling *batts eyelashes* That story en, e get as e be. Ayam sha not an omokomo geh jor *adjusts holy cape and sips holy water*.

    So you've read 'better'? Issokay. Fingers firmly crossed

    Nollywood REinvented: When my friend returns my books, i'll read and let you know. Deal? But you sef fit read and gime heads-up na. Biko.

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  42. Bukky Apampa: Glad i make you laugh jere. It's soul food. As for your question, What skirt are you talking about? *runs away*

    Dayor: Thanks for voting for me ma'am. I'm glad i won too xo

    Afronuts: I no know o. No be say anybody dey kuku force me but you know how Yorubas say the money wey person take buy corn meal wey soft, no go gree person to throw am away (even though i didn't actually buy them)

    WorshipandSwag: Lmaooo. Don't get paranoid please. Rock all the skirts you own although i think it's a good idea to get those that'll allow you do your taekwando poses *wink

    Myne: lol, what accidental slit are you talking about? *side eye* I think i have selective amnesia lol

    OSB: I'm sorry *pouts*

    Gbemisoke: The skirt story is erm, erm, erm...i can't seem to get the word out o *runs away*

    Atoskin: Embarrassment does not even begin to cut it. That's not saying it happened o en en and it's not saying it didn't

    Atilola: Hmn, my sister, it is well *lips sealed* About the books, i hear you loud and clear.

    Tamie: I know you'll ask and i'm still not telling jor lol. I can borrow you as soon as you're ready to read.

    Jemima: lmao *batts lashes* That story though, wait, what story are we talking about again? Oh well, guess the temp. amnesia stepped in again lmao

    Ay: A feeling ba? No jor lol.

    MsJB: Thanks girl and no one would want to be that girl.

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  43. Strong Self: Thanks man. As for that story, lips are firmly sealed

    Sugarspring: *offers her benyln with codeine for the cough* I hope that worked lol. Lmao@mummy porn. Ok ma'am

    Rainbowlove: You're welcome and i don't know where these stories come from o *innocent face*

    Relentless: Who said that story is real? or isnt? *tongue out*

    Rhapsody B: You're on 78 already??? OMG! I love your 100 book goal for 2012. I want to try it for 2013 too. I hope i can be disciplined enough to pull through. So fingers crossed on when ever you get to 50shades.

    Ms Nana: aww, i'm so sorry about your jollof rice my darling and i'm still not telling if it's real or fake. Now i feel like eating that. Maybe i should just say it. Ok, so the story is *cough and clears throat* what were we talking about *looks blank and dodges shoe* Cos you're my girl, maybe i'll tell you in camera :D

    Confessions: Ok then *salutes*

    Lovelifeforsale: I haven't read Venus in Furs though. So it's a 'yay' from you. Cools. I've been around man. Saw your comment on Dammy's post. You naughty naughty boy. Hope you're cool too. You been mia.

    DOHK: Plix don't report me na. I wee give you my lunch pack *pout* Real or not, not telling :)

    Kemi Filani: Thanks for coming around babes ;) Apparently y'all missed the part i specifically asked you not to ask. #sigh.

    So should i spill or not? Fact or fiction? Still not telling *grin*

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  44. Lool I.literally laughed out loud about the comando story.... Boi I hope its not true coz the embarrassment wud probbly kill me there nd then lool.... Gd one still

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  45. heheheheheheh Wait! You know me nah! I am CRAZY like that.. Biko Translate in English.. WaRRis Commando?! heheheheh and biko.. Pray do tell eh!! Was that a real situation ni or was it a made up story?! Choiii! my guy my guy e haf see.. hehehehe.

    On a serious note though Egbon.. Life is Fun.. Live it. Blessings Bubba.

    P.S: @ "I am not getting any *coughs*" are you sure you dont need to see a doctor for these on and off coughing?! :) xx Miss you even if I haven't met you :(

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Hit me nicely