I'M NOT DEAD...SERIOUSLY, I'M NOT

I've missed all you crazy people that make me laugh :)

First of all, Lets do some news rounds.

Yo! Sykik is a mom y'all!!! We have born Boy!! I'm making myself godmom! *shakes ikebe*

SisiYemmie is now a mommy too with a mini-Bobo. Congratulations guys *muah*

Honeydame is backk!!!! Ok, not really but she posted after one year so that should count for something, right?

SingleNigerian showed his face briefly but he's back in hibernation too.

My friendship, Unveiling Gold is back too...uhm, well partially. At least she's reading and leaving comments. Baby steps people.

I still miss Beautiful and her gists *sigh*

Sting is now a Doctor!!! Whooooooot!!! We need to pop something, yes? Let me go and complain to her about this headache sef :D

Atilola, You're the real MVP. Constantly blogging ain't beans.

HD's culinary skills is something that is receiving scant attention. For those skills, I could marry her. From Edikaikong *stomach rumbles* to Ogbono *more rumbles* to fried rice and chicken in some kind of delicious sauce, back to egusi or to the random pot of jollof that I drive all the way from work to her house to obtain, fadaludd needs to epp me! Can you tell that I shamelessly like food? I'm don't even currrrr! I honestly don't know how people are not falling over themselves for this hotness and her skills. Oh wait, I think they are lool. There's absolutely no harm in falling harder is all I'm saying. The girl can throw down in the kitchen!!!

So I went to Port-harcourt for the first time with HD!!! Yass! I also ate bole and spicy fish *relishes the memory* I think I had white soup too. Plus there is this child that I fell in love with since she was born. Her smile makes everything alright. I've had her as my lap top wallpaper since forever. I finally met her. Baby girl is just cuteness all round. Oh wait, they're are actually two of them. Too cute. I met 9jasGreat too. You can head on over here to read a brief recap. Oh, and Single Nigerian almost got us straight passes to hell for almost slapping a church usher (which I would not have minded much really loool) but that's story for another day.

Lately, there's been a something about babies and I. I'm not even sure I understand it anymore. First, I hung out with HD one time and during our meal, there was drama with a couple and their twin babies seating close to us. The boy twin would take one look at me and start giggling. I mean, I'll remove my face but once he caught my eyes again, the boy would break out into this huge grin. Every darn time! #NoKidding. It was so freaky. A while back too, I went for a friend's birthday party and this little baby girl munchkin decided I was her playmate and proceeded to freak everyone out because apparently, she usually does not play with strangers. Sigh. God, is this a sign? I haven't met my Alhaji yet so I don't know how I'm bringing one of these into the world. #NoTwinZone

My hair people! My hair! Atoskin, I'm sorry but this has to be said. God has shown his glory. My hair is long yo! Long! As in, my hair that was re-christened chicken scratch scanty is now long! Miracles happen people! By the way, I finally met Atoskin too! Hi Atoskin and her hips. I see you both!

So on to my nails. Here is what they used to look like. 

Lovely and things but brethren, I can't even show you the "after" picture because it is disgraceful. I maintain that HD stole them. Don't tell me noth'n. Plus, I never used to bite my nails. I still don't but you'd never believe me with the way they look at the moment. I remember wishing/tweeting my hair would grow as fast as my nails did at some point last year. To now add salt to injury, I tried to henna my hair. I wore gloves as prescribed but my hair didn't even show any hint of colour but guess what got dyed? My darn nails, that's what. *breathe Toin breathe*Anyways, God is finally showing mercy. My nails are not there yet but they are definitely on their way.

I don't want to overload this post but I just needed to tell y'all I'm breathing and in one piece. I have to give the loudest sharaouts to Duru! This guy is the most annoying but adorable aburo ever. He legit checks in on me almost every week. He drops comments on here too. If you don't believe, just check how many comments in dropped in my last post. And that's excluding the ones he told me not to upload on here. Rhapsody has also been amazing. She legit checked up on me most after Duru. You're both amazeballs *muah* To everyone who checked up on me, I love you guys with my whole growing butt. Forever family, you all are. To my new readers, I see y'all and I'll be stalking soon.

Oh, and I'm going to reply all of your comments on my last post. All 64 of them *sniff* You guys are the bestest. I tried my best to read you guys but lets play catch-up. What have I missed?

P.S: Is anyone watching So You Think You Can Dance? I love that show!!! This season is definitely different with the stage vs street thing going on. There's something about dance that makes my blood sing. It's just so groovy.

I'M BACK WITH GIST!

Photo Credit

First things first, Happy New Year Peoples!

Since this post has refused to finish itself (it's 2014 please so somebody needs to make that app asap...and the one that downloads food as well), I have decided to put it up anyway. I trust you all had a wonderful holiday season. A lot has happened and I have been trying to keep up. Ginger is married and expecting, Tizzle is next #Faithing and New Dawn aka Simply me is back! Even MissBuki is back! I'm loving it all.

Contrary to popular speculation (side eyes Naijawife) Single Nigerian did NOT pound my yams. I'm not even sure the guy can make...oh wait, he can. I've seen pictures of his legendary culinary skills so yes he can but I digress. Let me get to the gist.

I met Honeydame and Single Nigerian!!! Whoop!!! Oh boy!! To think HD sniffed me out a day before our first meet-up. Crazy stuff I tell you. You can read her recap here. The second meet-up was with Single Nigerian! I'm on a roll abi? When I picked SN up, I almost crashed my car due to over-excitement loool (is Naijawife reading this yet?) Yes, I picked him in my car. We were alone and things :D I am such a minx. So much for staying outa drama in 2014. #sigh. Anyways, he is kinda cute and he definitely has grab-able cheeks (pun intended) Don't ask me how I know these things (tongue in cheek). However,  *cough* feel free to email/dm me for more details *wink*

Did I mention HD has the softest butt? Oh dear mama! The lord is good! Very soft and cushy something. From now on, anytime she's around, I shall no longer be talking about my ikebe. Yea, she complexed me badly. *sigh* Oh and of course she's pretty with dimples. Wizkids's "she carry front, she carry back, she too package, I can't leave her" song is apt :D

Let me now set the record straight: My nyansh is not catfish :p She is probably comparing our ikebes which well, honestly is not fair because hers is like extra extra and mine is shekem compared to hers *deepsigh*

Quick question: If somebody has stretch marks on somebody's ikebe, does that mean the ikebe will one day be robustly robust? I'm of course asking for a friend's friend. ^_^

Have I mentioned that I'm a paparazzi? Yes I am but HD and SN kept shying away from my camera. I got some good ones though *huge grin* besides, when HD was trying to get ice cream, she unwittingly backed me and I got a very nice picture of the overload nyansh hehehe. You can of course DM/email me for details as well. A girl's got to make money somehow this year.

I almost forgot, HD almost made me touch SN's kini o! Ah! Let me tell you what happened. So I was scoping somebody's abs and I went closer to touch the said abs. That was when HD said: let your hand go lower!  Lower bawo?? Alakoba babe. The meet up was really fun and I can't wait to do it again and again :D Those two are definitely a handful. I kept saying 'behave' for most of the day. SN's Hangover 4 movie reference sounds about right.

It feels good to be back. I rested well and had some fun. I did babysit my nieces which was no easy feat. Herculean task really. I'm just praying for strength for when I have mine. #TeamNoTwins. The 5year old is such an adult with a truckload of questions but the 3 year old is so much like me it's uncanny. Oh, and my twin 2year old nieces sing and dance to Katy Perry's Roar. Tim actually goes: "...dancing through the fire cos I am a champion..." I don't even know what to say. I mean they were born like 2 minutes ago and they can already say words like "awesome!" #ShakingMyHead.

I finally saw Game of Thrones, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I usually don't like starting new series with only one season but somehow, I did and I'm loving Witches of Eastend, Devious Maids and Orange is the New Black. I actually hope to download less this year and read more #SoHelpMeGod. I think I read about 18 books last year. Not good enough but I'm working on it. Thanks to those who keep the books coming *kisses* I read a review of "I Do Not Come To You By Chance" by Adaobi Tricia Nwaubani on Cherrywine's blog and I sent the link to a friend (we're always on the lookout for good books) and he got it for me. I loved it. I'll probably be reading it again in a couple of months. I honestly can't wait for Adaobi's next book. The editor in me would of course have loved to change a few things but for Adaobi's first offering, it was really good.

Another book that fell for was Diaries of a Dead African by Chuma Nwokolo. The book was an impulse buy but oh goodness, it was totally worth it. I haven't laughed out loud like I did while reading that book in a while. It is a novel in three diaries written by Meme Jumai (farmer) and his two sons; Abel (failed writer) and Calamatus (aspiring conman). Hilariously funny. I should probably do a review. The book is definitely recommended.

So this year, as much as I know drama follows me around, I'll try my best to stay out of drama. I'd try to blog more too (yea Atilola and MsJB, I picked my sub) I miss all the old bloggers like PET Projects, Unveiling Gold, Stelzz etc. I guess life happened and a lot of people went on hiatus. This post is getting too long even.

 

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2013 was a good year. Although I don't do resolutions, I have already started making some changes. I hope to take better care of myself. I'm trusting God for several major things this year. I know it's minor to Him, but they are majorly major to me. To everyone who reads this blog and comments, you're amazeballs. For those who keep checking up on me, You have no idea how awesome you are. Thank you so much. Let's all keep living, laughing, loving and learning. Life is beautiful. As for Nigeria, just when you think it can't possibly get worse, it does. Fingers crossed. 

I hope we all have an even more amazingly amazing 2014. *blows kiss*